There is one blog I have been avoiding for a very long time, sexism. It has been the hardest thing I have ever tried to write. You see no matter who you are there are certain principles that you just cant escape. For me, being a man, the systemic principles of sexism are obvious. The big problem is knowing that they exist and how do I defeat my own perceptions. Awareness is not just a cute buzzword, its a discipline. I have made it my life’s work to stay a student, never believing that Im a master. Oh sure, there are many men that think they know of the sexist tactics that permeate our planet. But do you? As a man can you pick up on everyone of them? As a man do they directly effect you? Or are we just grasping at straws?
So you got the answers? Or is it male privilege that gives you that superior stance? I have been in the workforce, as a manager for over 20 years and there are things I have seen and heard that to this day makes me want to say...damn we men suck! There are prejudices that move from the obvious to the covert. The obvious, we make more than women, we hold more positions of power than women, and last but not least, we are not all that willing to concede those benefits. That is the covert...we have a very inconvenient truth.
Whether it be suffrage, employment, or political positions, even sexual freedom, we started the race to the top years before women did. Have you ever been the new kid in school? Was it hard to fit in? Hard to be accepted? Well if you magnify that exponentially, that is what it is like to be a woman. Imagine that you cant fit in? Imagine that you aren’t accepted? Imagine, just based on the visual presentation, you are different and treated accordingly. Someone spoke to me the other day about equality being about the freedom of choice, I just wonder, do women truly have that choice? Does the fact that she is a woman deter choices from her?
Of course they do, didn’t she start the race before men? Didn’t she get told what do to with her body, by law. Only a child molester is placed in a position to have laws dictate what he can do with his body. Is there a Roe v Wade for men? I think not.
As for jobs, a male nurse for a long time was laughed at because that is "women's work". It is tragic that a woman is laughed at because she wants to have the freedom of choice to do a "man's job".
I know that many men are thinking as they read this:
I have never discriminated against a woman, so why should I care?
Hey man, that just the way it is, right?
Or my favorite...they ARE inferior to us! Accept it!
Equal pay, for equal work, drop the need to remove choices, pay attention to the fact that our society offered them a seat to the table...long after we had made the rules.
Cause whether we like it or not...they bear the burden of climbing a ladder that we are many rungs above.
We as men must bear the burden of knowing that we still must fight daily...not to look down on them.
The system has made even the most empathic man, a sexist feminist.
If you acknowledge their burden, their fight, then join in raging against the machine. Not your guilt, not your apathy, and never your pity will make things right. Just your honesty and discipline.
Be a student, be a man.
1 comment:
I am sorry that it took you so long to write this. First I as a woman would like to thank you for writing this. There are so many things that women face in every day life that no one ever speaks of. I am glad that you had the courage to speak of your thoughts. I hope that this will make more people aware of the things they do without even realizing they are doing them. And maybe more people will open up!
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